(CUTTO: Backstage. New ERA President Marcus LaRoque is walking through the hallway looking in different rooms. He stops a young man with a headset on.)
LaROQUE: "Have you seen Chaos?"
(The man shakes his head. LaRoque walks by him.)
LaROQUE: "I know he’s the one who burnt Cane .. and if I get my hands on him.."
(LaRoque stops another person when he gets to his door.)
LaROQUE: "Have you seen Chaos?"
MAN: "No, sir."
LaROQUE: "God dammit.. well go get me a coffee …"
(He turns to the door, but stops and turns back around.)
LaROQUE: "And as soon as any of you see Chaos, I want him in my office STAT."
(LaRoque opens the door to his office where Chaos is sitting and smiling back. Chaos waves a gloved hand at LaRoque and grins widely.)
CHAOS: "Hey boss... you wanted to see me?"
LaROQUE: "Yes, I did... damn't what did you do?"
CHAOS: "What... you mean Cane? Look do you really think I did that? Why... I've got a chance to throw him off a twenty-foot scaffold later tonight. Now why would I risk the opportunity to do that?"
LaROQUE: "So you're telling me you didn't do that?"
CHAOS: "No... why would I risk ruining your Main Event tonight... no take a deep breath. Relax... we need to chat."
LaROQUE: "We do... about what?"
CHAOS: Look just go behind your desk... I think you’re going to want to be sitting."
(As LaRoque takes a seat behind his desk, they are both distracted by one of the florescent light tubes above flickering off and on.)
LaROQUE: "So what do we need to discuss?"
CHAOS: "Well the Main Event tonight."
LaROQUE: "What about it?"
CHAOS: "Well you don't have one.."
LaROQUE: "What do you mean... even if Cane can't wrestle...you still will be facing John Doe later tonight."
CHAOS: "Well that's what you think, but there's a problem with that.."
LaROQUE: "..and that is?"
CHAOS: "My contract... after tonight... expires."
(LaRoque pauses for a moment..)
LaROQUE: "It does.. but you're still contracted to wrestle tonight."
CHAOS: "Yeah, but I can also walk, LaRoque, and that means you DON'T have a Main Event tonight."
LaROQUE: "You'd walk and risk the law suit I'm going to file against you?"
CHAOS: "With pleasure, too.. and don’t tempt me, because you know I will... ooor you could easily remedy this situation."
LaROQUE: "..and how would I do that?"
(Chaos pulls two pieces of paper out of his jacket pocket. He hands them to LaRoque who looks them over for a second and then looks back up at Chaos.)
LaROQUE: "Are you serious?"
CHAOS: "Very serious... you sign that contract and all is well. Or I walk tonight and your Main Event is screwed... hell this whole card is screwed."
LaROQUE: "I'm going to have to get back to you on this... I need to talk it over with a few people."
CHAOS: "Hey... no problem, boss... I got nothing but time."
(The light above them flickers again.)
CHAOS: "You know you really should get that fixed."
(LaRoque chuckles.)
LaROQUE: "Thanks to you I got more important things to worry about… wait here."
(LaRoque stares down at the paperwork as he leaves the office muttering something under his breath. CUTTO: Ringside.)
GHEORGHE: "Welcome back to New ERA RAUCOUS!"
JULIUS: "I think people know we are back you fuck, we are live."
JIVE: "What do you think I have been saying since New ERA started?"
JULIUS: "Nobody cares about you, NICK."
GHEORGHE: "And that’s what I have been saying since New ERA started. It’s time for the return of Shawn Hart!"
JIVE: "This should be quite interesting."
JULIUS: "Un… like…. you."
(The lineup comes on screen. CUEUP: 'Nobody Does It Better' by Carly Simon, the crowd goes wild as Shawn Hart pops out from the curtain.)
JACOBS: "The following match is scheduled for one fall! Making his way to the ring .. weighing in at approximately 224 pounds, he stands 5’11, and hails from Orlando, Florida… HE IS ‘THE PHENOM’ SHAWN HART!!"
(He gets a large pop as he slaps hands with the fans and slides in the ring.)
GHEORGHE: "Shawn Hart looking better than ever!"
JULIUS: "My karma is giving me a bad sense, like something isn’t right."
JIVE: "You’re not right. That’s what it is."
JULIUS: "No, it’s something else .. it’s not the usual sense .. like when my gay-dar is going off when I am around you."
(CUEUP: 'Won't Back Down' by Tom Petty. Steve Johnson hops out from the curtain as the fans give him a pop as well.)
JACOBS: "And his opponent …. he stands 6’3 and weighs 230 pounds … hailing from Columbus, Ohio…. this is STEVE JOHNSON!"
(He slides in the ring and looks at Hart.)
GHEORGHE: "This could be the most technically sound match we see tonight!"
JULIUS: "Or the biggest waste of money."
JIVE: "You’re a waste of money…"
JULIUS: (Golf Clap) "Good comeback."
(SFX: Bell rings.)
GHEORGHE: "Hart and Johnson circling, here comes the tie up. Hart with the arm bar. He lifts, goes under the arm. Nice arm ringer into the hammer lock."
JIVE: "Boring…."
JULIUS: "Not as much as your commentary skills."
GHEORGHE: "Hart kicks Johnson’s knee cap… Johnson goes face first into the mat... Hart now cranking the arm of Johnson from the Hammer lock... He lets go after a few seconds and hops to the front to apply the side headlock."
JIVE: "I do not have bad commentary skills! I can call a match."
GHEORGHE: "Be my guest, Nick."
JIVE: "FINE! Johnson is getting up to his feet… but Hart sticks his hip out … and, uh, Hart puts Johnson back to the mat with a flip throw kind of thing."
GHEORGHE: "That flip thing is called a headlock takeover, Nick, thank you."
JULIUS: "LO…..SER."
JIVE: "Oh really? Then you try it!"
JULIUS: "Ok! Hart wrenches the head of Johnson, but Johnson getting his legs around the head of Hart … and he is trying to choke him out! Hart lets go of Johnson’s head and kips up to his feet! Hart on his feet, and now Johnson on his feet and the crowd applauds both men so far."
GHEORGHE: "Very nice."
JIVE: "Show off."
JULIUS: "Fuck you."
GHEORGHE: "Johnson now lifting his hands and calling for a test of strength. Hart reaches up to grab his hand .. but Johnson switches hands.. Hart follows… and it looks like Steve Johnson can’t make up his mind as he switches hands once more."
JIVE: "Hart said the hell with this and just slugged Johnson square in the jaw."
JULIUS: "Heh, say good bye to the technical wrestling of this match! Johnson on his feet … and Hart cracks him again!"
GHEORGHE: "Johnson to his feet.. and he turns around… HUGE ARM DRAG FROM SHAWN HART! Hart, the veteran, using the skills he has gained over time."
JULIUS: "He isn’t just a veteran he is an ass kicking machine."
JIVE: "I think he is a cheater! He never let Johnson have a chance to get up."
GHEORGHE: "Johnson looking groggy as he struggles to his feet, but Hart wastes no time as he sends him to the corner with an irish whip.. and Johnson hits the turnbuckle HARD! Shawn Hart charges in after him …. NO! Steve Johnson gets the foot up and boots ‘the Phenom’ right in the face! Hart turns away holding his jaw … and here comes Steve Johnson! Johnson with a chop block to Harts knee cap and Hart goes down."
JULIUS: "That’s what you get when you give someone a chance to rest, what a stupid ass."
JIVE: "HA! So much for a veteran!"
GHEORGHE: "Johnson grabs the leg of Hart … and he drops an elbow! Now Johnson applying a heel lock … Steve Johnson stands up … and he sends a boot into the left leg of Hart .. and AGAIN! Johnson grabs Hart’s leg and pulls him over to the ropes … and now he’s resting Hart’s leg on the bottom rope … Johnson now climbing the turnbuckle!!"
JIVE: "OH YES! LEG DROP FROM THE TURNBUCKLE ONTO HART’S HURT LEG!"
JULIUS: "FUCK YEAH! I love high flying shit like that!"
GHEORGHE: "He could have broken Hart’s leg! Steve Johnson picks Hart up by the head .. and connects with a SHIN BUSTER! That injured leg of Hart is being worked over by Steve Johnson …. Johnson pulls Hart into the center of the ring by his leg … AND HE TURNS HIMSELF AROUND AND APPLIES A FIGURE FOUR!"
JULIUS: "That’s all! Call it, it’s over!"
JIVE: "YES! BREAK HIS LEG!"
GHEORGHE: "Shawn Hart in an obvious amount of pain as he sits straight up… and he starts banging on the mat … but Steve Johnson has the hold locked in tight and he leans back to add more pressure to the leg."
JIVE: "Hart is trapped. He can’t get out of the figure four … so he might as well just tap now."
GHEORGHE: "I doubt that tapping is on Shawn Hart’s mind right now. He’s a crafty veteran who can get out of almost any jam."
JIVE: "Then he’s going to look doubly foolish when he passes out from the pain!"
GHEORGHE: "Johnson straining the leg… and the fans are starting to get louder and louder as they show their support for ‘the Phenom..’ …. Hart pounding on the mat trying to turn it over …."
JULIUS: "Come on, Hart!"
GHEORGHE: "The fans are on their feet …. And Shawn Hart is starting to rock Steve Johnson and the figure four!"
JIVE: "He CAN’T turn it over. There’s no way!"
GHEORGHE: "Johnson looking around to try to find some way to stop Hart from flipping the figure four … Johnson reaches forward to punch Hart.. BUT HART BLOCKS IT … AND NAILS JOHNSON INSTEAD! Hart now quickly rolls himself over… AND HE REVERSES THE FIGURE FOUR!!!"
JIVE: "NOOO!!"
JULIUS: "But Steve Johnson doesn’t stay in it for long as he kicks his legs free from the hold."
GHEORGHE: "Shawn Hart crawls over to the ropes in an effort to bring himself to his feet .. but he stops and rests his arms and upper body over the second rope.. Steve Johnson back on his feet and he stops … and now he’s pointing to his head as he bounces off the opposite ropes and comes in to hop on Hart’s back….."
JULIUS: "HELL NO! Hart moves his head and Johnson racks his nuts on the second rope!"
JIVE: "Say goodbye to Little Steve Johnson..."
JULIUS: "You would know a good thing or two about little johnsons, wouldn’t you…"
GHEORGHE: "Hart grabbing both of Steve’s legs… CATAPULT INTO THE TURNBUCKLE! Steve Johnson holds onto the corner so he doesn’t fall back to the mat … Shawn Hart getting to his feet … and now Johnson releases his deathgrip from the turnbuckles … AND GETS HIT IN THE BACK OF THE HEAD WITH A DROPKICK BY SHAWN HART! Johnson back into the corner and he stumbles backwards … Hart with a school boy … ONE ………. TWO …….. THR—NOOO! Kickout by Steve Johnson."
JIVE: "I bet Johnson wishes he never let go of the turnbuckles..."
GHEORGHE: "Shawn Hart bends to pick Johnson up off the mat .. and knees him in the face for good measure. Hart hooks the arm of Johnson and lifts him up for a vertical suplex… And down they go!"
JULIUS: "TIMBER! NO! JOHNSON TURNS MID-AIR CROSSBODY! WITH THE COVER!!!"
GHEORGHE: "ONE … TWO… and Hart kicks out easily."
JULIUS: "We’ve got company!"
GHEORGHE: "No! NO! NO! Both men laying on the ground while the ref starts the ten count, and now we have Jonathan Marx and John Doe heading down to ringside. Doe and Marx stop … and they are cheering Shawn Hart? Why are they doing that?"
JIVE: "Shit if I know."
GHEORGHE: "Half of DREDD is down here at ringside ... Both men making their way to their feet now .. Doe points at Johnson, Marx shakes his head. What the hell are they talking about?!"
JIVE: "Johnson with a boot to the gut…. he is putting Hart head between his legs…. CALLING FOR A POWERBOMB!"
JULIUS: "HE LIFTS HART UP…. HERE IT COMES!"
GHEORGHE: "NOOOOO!!! HART WITH A HEAD SCISSORS TAKEDOWN! HART HOOKING THE LEG!!!!"
JIVE: "John Doe is yelling at Hart to pull the tights … and HE DOES!"
GHEORGHE: "ONE …… TWO …… THREE!! Shawn Hart has won the match!"
(SFX: Bell rings!)
JACOBS: "Here is your winner… SHAWN HART!!!"
GHEORGHE: "He listened to Doe? Why…. why would you listen to any of DREDD."
JIVE: "Because they are nice boys, Gheorghe. Look at them hold the ropes open for ‘the Phenom’… That’s what I call good sportsmanship."
JULIUS: "You are so stupid."
GHEORGHE: "Well DREDD aside, congrats to Shawn Hart for the victory here tonight … we’ve got to take a commercial break .. but we will be back shortly as our 2 year anniversary show continues from Worcester, Massachusetts!"
