(FADETO: Backstage. Who are we with? None other than the freshest blood on the New ERA roster, "El Perno Prisierno Uno" Angel Latora. He is repping a pair of baggy white pants with yellow lightning strikes on them. He wears a full head mask that is matching his pants, except no lightning strikes.)
ANGEL: "¿Que tal tipo?"
(Angel is talking to owner, Marcus LaRoque. LaRoque no hablo espanol.)
LaROQUE: "Umm...yeah, dude. So how's your mask fit? Too Tight? Too Loose? I'll get you a new one if you don't like the one you got."
(Angel adjusts the mask.)
ANGEL: "It's fine."
LaROQUE: "Anything you need? A cup of water? A couple fine honeys? I'm here to help you, "El Perno Prisierno."
ANGEL: "No no no no no no.... "El Perno prisierno" no necesito tu ayudar con la senoritas! Angel es el Papi Chulo, ese! The Pimp Daddy, holmes!"
LaROQUE: "Okay, well, anything you need, give me a buzz."
ANGEL: "Yo comprendo, holmes."
(And we fade away from these two individuals as LaRoque walks off. CUTTO: Ringside.)
JIVE: "Jesus Christ, this place is turning into Mexico. First we have El Arco Iris, now ‘El Perno Prisierno Uno’…"
GHEORGHE: "From what I’ve heard that is one of our newest stars, Angel Latora .. I’ve heard some very good things about this high flyer, and it is apparent that Marcus LaRoque is trying to make his stay here as comfortable as possible so far."
JIVE: "LaRoque always catering to the needs of his wrestlers. He needs to stand up and let them know that they’re going to need to work to get places here."
GHEORGHE: "Well one of our next competitors in the following match is definitely proving his worth, or at least trying to, as he takes on not only one, but TWO guys tonight.. Suicide definitely has his work cut out for him here in Greensboro!"
JIVE: "Suicide is going to burn himself out tonight and that’s not going to look good in the eyes of Marcus LaRoque, and lets not even mention how angry Juliet Marceau is going to be."
GHEORGHE: "We haven’t seen a lot of Juliet recently, do you know where she may be?"
JIVE: "Last thing I’ve heard is that she’s on a crusade recruiting more guys that she thinks can help balance the scale of New ERA."
GHEORGHE: "That’s all we need are more terrorists and psychos."
JIVE: "Marceau has an eye for talent, Tom."
GHEORGHE: "The last talent she signed was taken off to a mental hospital."
JIVE: "How was she supposed to know that’d happen!"
GHEORGHE: "They’re called medical records … but I’m receiving word that it is now time to start this match up … Suicide will be in action against ‘the Messenger’ Trevor Cane … as we kick this title-crowning edition of RAUCOUS off, live from the Greensboro Coliseum in Greensboro, North Carolina!"
(CUTTO: Carl Jacobs standing in the ring as the lineup for this match flashes on the screen.)
JACOBS: "The following match is scheduled for ONE FALL and has a thirty minute time limit!"
(CUEUP: ‘Unkind’ by Destrophy as the fans begin to boo. The lights in the arena go off and Trevor Cane begins to walk down to ringside.)
JACOBS: "Introducing first … weighing in at 263 pounds .. and standing SIX foot FIVE ….. he hails from Sarasota, Florida …"
(Cane rolls into the ring looks up at the ceiling for a few moments and then stands in the corner.)
JACOBS: "The Messenger’ ….. TREVOR CANE!"
JIVE: "Look at that fine specimen. He is ready to show Suicide the light, the way and the truth."
GHEORGHE: "What the hell are you saying? You’re beginning to sound as incomprehensible as Cane does."
JIVE: "Cane has been plotting the revealing of his message for a long time now .. tonight, I’ve been told, is the night."
GHEORGHE: "We’ll see, Nick … we’ll see."
JACOBS: "And his opponent…"
(CUEUP: ‘Sober’ by Tool.)
JACOBS: "He hails from the Bronx, New York ….. standing in at 6’3" and weighing in at 231 pounds…."
(The lights come back on as the first guitar rift plays as Suicide is standing at the top of the rampway. He begins to walk down slowly.)
JACOBS: "SUICIDE!"
(Suicide comes down to the ring, and enters the ring. He slowly takes off his trench coat and hat, and readjusts his gloves.)
GHEORGHE: "Suicide is staring a hole into Trevor Cane as Cane is staring right back at him."
JIVE: "That’s not fair .. Suicide has a patch over one eye, he could be looking elsewhere and we wouldn’t even know."
(SFX: Bell rings.)
GHEORGHE: "And this match is underway as both men are circling each other. Trevor Cane is saying something to Suicide, but our microphones can’t seem to pick it up."
JIVE: "I think he’s telling him that the end of the world is close at hand, and if Suicide wants to cross over peacefully then he should lie down for him here tonight."
GHEORGHE: "Somehow I don’t think that’s the case, Nick. Trevor Cane goes to lock up with Suicide, but Suicide quick to go behind Cane … Cane with an elbow to the face to break free … and now he bounces off the ropes. Cane back and leapfrogs over Suicide, against the other ropes …. AND SUICIDE BRINGS HIM DOWN WITH A WELL PLACED DROPKICK!"
JIVE: "Cane was showing Suicide that even though he’s the bigger of the two, that he can still have some speed. Just so happens that Suicide caught him offguard."
GHEORGHE: "The Messenger back to his feet holding his face .. and Suicide grabs ahold of his arm … and sends him chest first into the turnbuckle! Cane stumbling backwards … Suicide catches him … GERMAN SUPLEXES CANE TO THE MAT!!! He brings up w/ a bridge …. ONE ….. TW—kickout by Cane!"
JIVE: "No wonder Suicide had that reputation in another league … look at how inconsiderate he was!"
GHEORGHE: "That was uncalled for, Nick."
JIVE: "I’m just telling it how I see it."
GHEORGHE: "Suicide picking up Cane and hooks him .. looks like he’s going to go for a variation of his Suicidedriver …. No … Cane trying to flip him over ……. AND SUICIDE SLIDES DOWN THE BACK AND ROLLS HIM UP …. ONE ….. TWO … KICKOUT by Cane!"
JIVE: "He’s slimy that Suicide."
GHEORGHE: "Cane looking to be slow getting up as Suicide is already ready and waiting ….. Cane to his feet … Suicide charges in at him, but Cane takes him down with a drop toe hold! Cane with the floatover headlock …. But Suicide uses the momentum to roll him on his side …. ONE …. And Cane releases the hold."
JIVE: "Suicide managing to tie Cane up early on in this match … This can’t be settling well with the Messenger."
GHEORGHE: "Now Cane looks over to the referee … and he’s complaining that Suicide was grabbing his hair!"
JIVE: "He’s so astute! I didn’t even noticed that .. but now that I think of it …."
GHEORGHE: "Oh please, Nick. I think that Trevor Cane is just trying to delay the tempo of this match. He knows that Suicide would easily get the upperhand if this turned into a fast paced match."
JIVE: "Oh he’ll show you, Tom. He’ll show you."
GHEORGHE: "The referee putting up his hands as if to say he didn’t see it .. and Cane now looking into Suicide’s eye … and Cane comes at him with a left hook, but Suicide blocks it … grabs his arm and twists it behind his back …. And he drives the shoulder into the turnbuckle! Trevor Cane comes out holding that shoulder … Suicide with another go beneath arm twister, and Cane flips over onto his back!!! Suicide drops the leg on the shoulder and now has him in an armbar!"
JIVE: "Isn’t there some kind of mandatory rest period that wrestlers need during matches?"
GHEORGHE: "No, there isn’t."
JIVE: "Are you sure?"
GHEORGHE: "Suicide wrenching on that arm …. But Trevor Cane now rolls over onto his knees… and he applies his weight onto Suicide!! ONE …. TWO – but Suicide manages to roll out of the pinfall attempt easily. Cane to his feet as Suicide is getting there .. Cane grabs Suicide’s head … AND HE RUNS AND JUMPS OVER THE TOP ROPE CATCHING SUICIDE’s NECK ON THE TOP ROPE!"
JIVE: "There’s the man we’ve been waiting to see!"
GHEORGHE: "The fans at ringside are giving Cane a piece of their mind, but he ignores them as he slowly slides back into the ring … he’s CRAWLING over to Suicide!! Trevor Cane …. TAKES SUICIDE’s HEAD INTO HIS ARMS???"
JIVE: "I’m not even going to touch that one … where’s Peter File as guest color commentator when you need him?"
GHEORGHE: "Cane looking up at the rafters as he is holding Suicide’s head … and now he drops it to the mat. What is going on?"
JIVE: "I think Cane is getting a message from his overlord!"
GHEORGHE: "Trevor Cane is walking around in circles looking at each corner! Now he’s pointing at that corner! What the hell is going on?"
JIVE: "Suicide is just starting to catch his breath again .. I pity him for what he’s about to go through …"
GHEORGHE: "Trevor Cane now walks over to Suicide and is dragging him over to that corner …. CANE SETS SUICIDE ON THE TOP ROPE AS HE IS GETTING UP THERE TOO!!!"
JIVE: "Here we go!"
GHEORGHE: "OH MY GOD! TREVOR CANE IS GOING TO TRY TO PILEDRIVE SUICIDE INTO THE MAT FROM THE TOP ROPE!"
JIVE: "If that’s what his God said to do, then that’s what he must do!"
GHEORGHE: "Trevor Cane smiles as he points up to the rafters …"
(SFX: Huge pop from fans)
JIVE: "HOLY SHIT!"
GHEORGHE: "SUICIDE JUST BACK BODY DROPPED THE UNSUSPECTING CANE OFF THE TOP ROPE TO THE ARENA FLOOR!!!"
(SFX: Another huge pop from fans.)
CROWD: "N . E . W ! N . E . W !"
GHEORGHE: "SUICIDE JUST MOONSAULTED OFF THE TOP ROPE AND ONTO TREVOR CANE ON THE ARENA FLOOR!!!!! TREVOR CANE IS ROLLED UP IN A BALL AS SUICIDE ROLLS OFF HIM!"
JIVE: "HE’s TRYING TO KILL HIM!"
GHEORGHE: "What an AWESOME display put on by Suicide! First backbody dropping Trevor Cane to the arena floor and then hitting a moonsault from TWENTY feet in the air!"
JIVE: "I bet you’d think it’d be awesome if Suicide pulled out a gun and shot ‘the Messenger’ next, eh?"
GHEORGHE: "Both men are on the arena floor as the referee is counting .. what a GREAT way to open RAUCOUS!"
JIVE: "GET UP…. NO NOT YOU!"
GHEORGHE: "Suicide is getting to his feet and walks over to Cane .. he picks up Trevor Cane and rolls him into the ring! SUICIDE IS CALLING FOR THE END!!"
JIVE: "WE NEED SOME DIVINE INTERVENTION HERE!"
GHEORGHE: "Suicide picking up Trevor Cane … he’s going to END IT WITH THE BURNING HAMMER!!"
JIVE: "Does anyone have a bucket of water?? A hose? A two-ton wife to throw?"
GHEORGHE: "Wait … Suicide drops Trevor Cane to the mat …. And he pins him!!! ONE ……… TWO ………. THREE!!!! Suicide has done it!"
(SFX: Bell rings)
JACOBS: "The winner of this match by pinfall …… SUICIDE!"
JIVE: "What arrogance! He just showed the world that he didn’t even need to do the Burning Hammer to beat him! That’s a proverbial slap in the face!"
GHEORGHE: "I think that Suicide was showing some respect to Cane .. he probably knew he had taken an awful amount of punishment …"